Saturday, August 28, 2010

Finding my center

Babycakes if off to distant lands again -- for two months. Since this is now becoming more common, I begin to see distinct patterns for myself and one of them is that whenever he leaves (or returns for that matter), I get thrown a little off balance. It only lasts for a few days -- like the jetlag that he feels on his end -- but I need to learn how to take care of myself during that time. Sleep more? Meditation? Yoga? Eat more?! Shopping?!!

Yep, you guessed it, so far my pattern has been that I eat more and I shop! Part of the eating more is that Babycakes does most of the cooking, but also it's a way to comfort myself ... I ENJOY the experience of eating out with the girls. And the shopping! Yesterday during lunch (instead of eating out, since I was alone), I hit Chico's and spent $300! This morning as I was trying everything on again, I decided I don't really love any of it (except a pair of pants) and will return it all, but I wonder what frenzy was going through my head.

So, it's been four days now and I'm starting to feel more centered again and thinking about who I want to be and what I want to do. I want to eat less ... both for my health (eating out is a lot more calories) and for my wallet (way more expensive). I want to buy fewer things, but have them be things that I really love. I want to enjoy the experience of both of these things, not just fill holes. And I want to pursue some of my own hobbies again ... whether scrapbooking or sewing or jewelry making or something new. And finally, I want to add something active to my life -- hiking, biking, tennis, something. Right now, nothing sounds good except sitting on my fanny, but I think it's a build up thing ... if I start walking ten minutes a day, my feet and legs will start to develop better stamina (and perhaps help my plantar fasciitis).

Goals for this week:
o Walk ten minutes a day
o Add meditation back into morning routine
o spend 15 minutes a day decluttering
o eat whatever I want until I'm satisfied (conscious eating)
o read another chapter of Women, Food and God
o Create upbeat playlist for ten-minute walk

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